A Hot Mess

Game time temperature was 100 degrees and Derek Lowe could have planted tomatoes behind the mound and watered them with all of the perspiration that was wicking off of his body.  The Tribe built a 5-3 lead and, after Lowe sweated that away, came back to tie the game at 7.  7 runs, that should be enough, right?  Heck, Shelley Duncan had 2 hits.  Well, they actually scored 8.  And they lost.

And Lonnie Chisenhall broke his arm.

I could talk about Asdrubal Cabrera going yard for the second straight game.  I could admonish all of the prognosticators who claimed he could never match his production from 2011 (on pace for 86 RBI and his OPS is 70 points higher).  I could speak glowingly of Jack Hannahan, mired in a 4-for-38 slump, but still able to dazzle in the field and execute the fundamentals at the dish.  I could mention that Casey Kotchman cracked 2 more hits.

Sadly, that's not where I'm going.  Let's start with Chris Idionetti, who guest starred on the STO telecast and made sure that Indians fans were aware that a trade was unlikely.  With a depleted farm system and somewhere in the neighborhood of 10,000 holes in this leaky boat, he mentioned about six times that the team has to work with the players that it has.  OK, that's not awful.  I mean, it's disheartening because we're very much in that window that Idionetti described last season and we're struggling to stay above .500 and he doesn't want to add any more talent, but maybe this will cause him to critically evaluate the players on the roster and demand that the best 25 sit in that dugout every night.

(Insert loud buzzing sound here.)

Wrong-o!  As far as I can tell, Aaron Cunningham is still on the roster.  Do you remember that movie The Butterfly Effect?  It had that guy from Two and A Half Men in it?  & there was an alternate ending when he went back in time and strangled himself in the womb to spare the world from the horrors that his life would bring?  Slater, are you listening?  Alright, maybe a bit harsh, but the Burger King down the street is hiring.  Maybe that's a better fit for you?  Tell me, is it difficult to brandish all of those "super bad-ass" tats and simultaneously bat .181?  Do you feel good about yourself when you peer deeply into your own eyes in the mirror?  Are you proud of your contribution?  No, I'm not saying it's all your fault.  It's like asking a retarded monkey to crack the human genome.  Manning said as much when he commented that a young kid can't fill a utility outfield spot.  Remember Austin Kearns, who I pointed my torches and pitchforks at last year?  Well, he's batting .279 with an .817 OPS for Miami.  I'd rather have Kearns back!

And I appreciate Michael Brantley's contribution, but you cannot bat a guy cleanup if he has 1 home run at the end of June. 

Do you know what I hate?  People who bitch and moan without offering solutions.  So, here it is.  The Chiz Kid is DL bound.  Job #1 is recalling Russ Canzler.  In 17 games since June 15, Russ is batting .349 with 7 homers and 25 RBI.  His OPS is freakin' 1.184!  This is a no brainer.  Unfortunately, the Tribe brass has no brain, so it is far from a foregone conclusion.  Pronk is expected back early next week, which is exactly when AC gets the axe.  We play without a back-up shortstop, so running without a true reserve centerfielder would be fine.  Or, we could just call up Jason Donald and he could do both!  Sure, JD hit .178 with 16 K's in 45 at-bats during his first trip through and, before 2 hits last night, was mired in a 1-for-31 slump, but, I reiterate, the ghost of Mario Mendoza is better than Cunningham.  And Mendoza ain't even dead!

At least Joe Smith and Chris Perez each gave up a run in relief and we lost by one.  That makes me feel better...

Roll Tribe.

Cheers.